The Countertop Chronicles

So I was thinking, since it looks like Gov. Palin is going to miss at least the early part of this years hunting season (actually, I have no idea when it goes up in Alaska), I should blog mine. And, I get the double benefit of also getting to shill a little for Sportsmen for McCain/Palin (of which I have a role, but thats as much as I’m disclosing about myself) and continue the dog training blogging.

And so, today, labor day September 1 was the start here in Virginia of Dove Season. And a less than glorious start it was.

To start with, I got back from the beach last night at 1:00 am. Woke up at the crack of dawn this morning, and unpacked the cars. Rushing and racing, hoping to get out early so I can run down and pick up the dog and get out with him and the trainer. The only problem was - threefold.

First, for some dumb reason Virginia doesn’t allow you to shoot doves during the early part of the season before noon.

# Season Dates:

* September 1 - September 27
* October 4 - October 31
* December 27 - January 10

# Bag Limit: 15 daily and 30 in possession
# Shooting Hours: Noon until sunset in first segment, ½ hr before sunrise until sunset in last 2 segments.

WTF???????? Today, it was about 90 degrees at noon. There were no doves flying about. If they are going to impose a stupid restriction on hunting till mid afternoon - do it in December, or October, when its cooler.

Second, rushing down I realized I hadn’t gotten my license yet. No problem, I drive right by Gander Mountain. Rush in, grab some ammo, head to the counter and . . . . . VADGIF computer system has crashed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Gander’s computers can’t log in and get me a license. Holy crap!?!?!? Well, no fear I continue on and stop at the general store near the dog trainers, and low and behold I get my license at 12:50pm.

Three, get to the trainers, and we are out in the field by 1:45. Its hotter than the hinges of hell, and my poor black puppy dog isn’t taking the heat well. He’s quartering the field, heck he flushed a couple of quail (not in season) but by the time we worked the field a full 3/4 miles he’s clearly a little overheated. So we rest under a tree, and then work back to the creek and let him swim and discuss dogs and life and where his training will go.

Doug, the trainer, has some sage advice. He’s a great dog. He’s a smart dog. He’s an energetic dog. He’s still a puppy. Don’t train him at all. Give him a break, don’t press him this week. Get him out next Saturday and shoot some doves over him. Make it fun. Don’t overwork him. He’s gone through training, now its time to play the game. At this point, he thinks the best training for the dog is to get him in the field and have him

We also talked about future hunts for this season. He thinks Rex is big enough and certainly trained enough, to start in on the early goose season. He referred me to a local guy who went out and got 10 geese this morning and was asking him if he knew someone with a dog. Hoping this one works out.

He also referred me to someone who has a hunting preserve - both for Sportsmen for McCain purposes as well as someone who is much closer to me (Doug is about 2 1/2 hours away, this other guy is 40 minutes away) and has a hunting preserve. He said that he’s always looking for guides with dogs to take his clients out - and suggested I think about bringing Rex over and getting lots of experience by helping to guide on the weekends with him this winter. Pay is in tips, and having been to a shooting preserve before, those tips might very well be high enough to pay for most of my hunting this year (well, local stuff, not the trip to South Dakota or Missouri). We also talked some about getting pheasants and bringing Rex back down to run on those with Dog’s dog later in the fall when the weather gets better. Oh yeah, and I can hunt deer on his land . . . . sweat!!!

So, all in all, it was a great day (any day in the field is) even though I returned empty handed.

As we sit here waiting for Hurricane Fay to hit.

Sorry for the light postings. Been enjoying a very wet cold spring in the Mid West.

Interestingly (not), I had another great firearm travel experience. Showed up at Dulles on Wednsday morning and faced a 45+ minute line to check in baggage. But lo and behold, I was shooting in a Sporting Clays tournament the next day and had a firearm with me. There I go, to the TSA check in (actually, Oversized Baggage and Inspected Baggage Lane) at the United check in counter. No one is on the line and in 5 minutes my firearm’s been declared, xrayed, and I’m on my way.

Weather here, as I said, is cold and wet. Its been a horrid spring and the last two nights we’ve had tornado warnings. But folks, if you thought the food vs fuel situation brought on by ethanol was bad now (and corn, at $2.50 a bushel a year ago - hit $7.10 a bushel today) its gonna get a whole lot worse. Think major famine worse.

Here I am in the heart of the worlds corn belt. By this time of the year, ALL the corn and all the soybeans should be in the ground. Whatsmore, the corn ought to be calf high and preparing for the coming hot dry summer. Its not. In fact, its not even in the ground. Driving the 50 minutes, through the richest corn ground in the world, from the airport to the shotgun club and I saw not a single planted field. Instead, everything was bare ground, too wet to plant.

Going into this year - despite promises of gargunteed high yields, we were looking at a 7-10% reduction in intended corn plantings. Well, that 7-10% intended reduction just dropped perhaps as much as another 20%. And the corn that has been put in, isn’t doing good. Its doing horrid, and history shows - any way you look at it - that the trend is for this year to be a major major drought.

How bad - mark my words - Corn will hit $10 a bushel by the time the summer is done. We won’t have sufficient stocks to last the winter. Animals will have to be put down. Farmers will go out of business. And people will starve. Will it be on the level of the Irish potatoe famines - doubtful - our agriculturual economy is too advanced and will produce somehow someway the minimum needed to survive. But its gonna be painful, and if we listened to the hippies and environmentalists and did away with modern production practices - we might be on the verge of millions starving, if not dying, this year in the United States.

Remember that the next time a hippy liberal tells you to eat organic. Then punch them in the balls.

Out duck hunting yesterday, the canoe we were in flipped and we ended up in a tributary to the Potomac at 5:45 yesterday morning. It was 20 degrees outside. Today, its cold and cloudy, and D.C. is bracing for its first snow storm (well, if you can call 4-6 inches a snow storm) of the winter.

Which turns my mind to more pleasant, summery beach time thoughts.

Why Don’t We Get Drunk
Lyrics by Marvin Gardens

I really do appreciate the fact you’re sittin’ here
Your voice sounds so wonderful
But yer face don’t look too clear
So bar maid bring a pitcher, another round o’ brew
Honey, why don’t we get drunk and screw

Why don’t we get drunk and screw
I just bought a water bed, it’s filled up for me and you
They say you are a snuff queen
Honey I don’t think that’s true
So, why don’t we get drunk and screw
Why don’t we get drunk and screw
I just bought a waterbed it’s filled up for me and you

They say you are a snuff queen
Honey I don’t think that’s true
So why don’t we get drunk and screw
Yeah, now baby I say, (Lord!)
Why don’t we get drunk and screw

And its been bitter cold all week (like 7 degrees yesterday morning).

Since the unseasonably warm weather earlier this winter was all the fault of George Bush, Exxon Mobil, and U.S. induced anthropogenic climate change, I’m wondering if the recent unseasonably cold weather is not the fault of Al Gore, John Kerry, and David Doniger?