The Countertop Chronicles

I’ve sold two handguns to DC residents this morning.

What have you done to celebrate??

RIP

Spent 9 hours yesterday fishing the Upper Potomac - spent about 7 of them standing in the water in the waist deep water.

Exhausted, sore, sun burnt, loving life.

Todays promised posts will be delayed.

Went to the range today . . . .

Remington 700 280 Rem.
100 yard 5 shot group

WOW!

Full review of this, and three others coming soon

Her and her son Ben Taylor were just on the Howard Stern show.

Wow.

They spent 45 minutes talking about her marriage to that masshole James Taylor and the subsequent icy divorce.

Apparently neither has spoken to each other since they got divorced - even about important events in their kids life. And from the sound of it - which even Ben seemed to acknowledge - its mostly that masshole James Taylors fault (he won’t take her calls, didn’t speak to her at the daughters wedding - indeed made Carly use a porta potty at the wedding instead of allowing her in the house to pee).

Fuck him. Forget the ex-wife (but really - Mr. Sensitivity should grow up) what a fucking lousy situation to put your kids in.

The shocker (indeed, the whole thing was shocking . . . and incredible to hear) is that no one has ever talked to Carly Simon about this on the air, and for the most part, in private. Even the kids (which made Ben Taylor a bit uncomforable as he plays in both his mom and dad’s bands).

(oh yeah, her dad is the Simon in Simon & Shuster)
Here’s to you Carly. Keep doing what your doing.
Nobody does it better.

By the way, she has a totally different arrangement on Your So Vain. Wish I could find it online, because its even better than the original.

Maybe not a Jacqueline Mackey Paisley Passey level of a catch, but at least someone thinks I’m pretty good.

82 As a 1930s husband, I am Very Superior Take the test!

Working on a major brief. Up again till 3 am (twice this week). Its amazing how sharp the mind becomes when your motivated . . . .

We’re watching all six Star Wars movies again in the Countertop Household. Wife is a bit upset about this (its actually the fourth run in the last few weeks - after finishing up Indiana Jones) but I’ve got to say I’m proud of Boy Number 1. He’s showing fine taste in movies.

In honor of that, I present you Leia Fest

Yeah, no Dead today.

We ended up going to the Greek Taverna in McLean for Dinner Saturday night. The Greek Taverna is in the same building as Ocean M, where VCDL held one of their Saslaw Open Carry dinners. It also has a great picture - which they recently placed in a more promonient position - of armed Greek freedom fighters. We pulled into the parking lot there and saw a Maserati.

Whats the connection between guns and Maseratis?

Ted Nugent - with a face like a Maserati.

Wango Tango
Words and Music by Ted Nugent

All right! It’s zee Wango, zee Tango
1-2-3-4
Come on boys
Time to Wango

My baby she like to rock
My baby she like to roll
My baby she can dance all night
My baby got no control
She do the Wango Tango

My baby she can scream and shout
My baby she can move it out
My baby she can take a chance
My baby got a brand new dance

Wango Tango
Wango Tango
It’s a Wango Tango
Ooooh yeah! (oooooh..)
Baby!

My baby like to rock
My baby like to roll
My baby like to dance all night
She got no control
She do…

Wango Tango
Wango Tango
Wango Tango
Ooooh yeah! (oooooh..)

Yeahhhhhhhhhh!
Baby! Baby! Baby! Ooooh I like the way you look baby
You look like you’re made for me honey
If you wanna take a little chance
I’m gonna show you a new dance
Baby I gotta Wango down one time with you honey
I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it
Well, it’s a brand new dance
Yeah been sweepin’ the nation
I said a brand new dance
A rock ‘n’ roll sensation
Yeah I like it baby, I do it every night
I got to do it ‘cos I like it so much
Oh honey believe it baby
You see it’s a crazed gyration of the rock generation
It’s my motivation to avoid the nauseation, frustration
When I need some lubrication - Baby!
Kinda like, goes kinda like this
You take her right ankle out
You take her left ankle out
You get her belly propped down
You get her butt propped up
Yeah lookin’ good now baby
I think you’re in the right position now baby
Yeah but if you ain’t quite ready I’ll make sure everything is a little bit nicer ‘cos
I’m gonna get a little talcum
I’m gonna borrow it from Malcolm
Yeah you look so good baby I’m startin to drool all over myself
I got the droolin’, droolin’, get all wet, salivate, salivate
I got salivate late, salivate late, salivate late
Got salivate, salivate, salivate, salivate, heh heh heh
Yeah you look so good baby, I like it, I like it, I like it
You know what I been talkin’ about honey
It’s a nice dance, we gotta a nice dance goin’ here
Now what you gotta do, I’ll tell you what you gotta do
You got to pretend your face is a Maserati
It’s a Maserati
It’s a Maserati
It’s a gettin’ hotty
It’s a Maserati, Maserati, Maserati
It’s a fast one too man, that thing’s turbocharged
You feel like a little fuel injection honey?
I’ll tell ya about it, I’ll tell you about it
I’ll check out the hood scoop
I gotta get that hood scoop off, shine and shine and buff
I gotta buff it up, buff it up, buff it up, buff it up, buff it up,
Yeah, shiny now baby, heh heh heh
You’ve been drivin’ all night long
It’s time to put the old Maserati away
So you look for a garage, you think you see a garage
Wait a minute, Hey!, there’s one up ahead
And the damn thing’s open
Hello! Get in there!

Is my baby alive? (Is my baby alive?)
Is my baby alive? (Is my baby alive?)
Is my baby alive?
She Wango’d to death

Wango Tango (Wango Tango)
Wango Tango (Wango Tango)
Wango Tango (Wango Tango)
Wango Tango (Wango Tango)
Wango Tango
Wango Tango
Wango Tango
Wango Tango
Wango Wango
Tango Tango
Wango Wango Wango Wango
Tango Tango Tango Tango

Thanks Tam!!

Via Cafe Press (does that make these pre ban?)

Pics from the Countertop Archive

From this

to this

How could anyone be anti gun??

Is anyone really surprised?

In an article in Cuba’s communist youth newspaper, Juventud Rebelde, the 14-year old Gonzalez said he would never let ex-President Fidel Castro and his brother Raul Castro down. He joined more than 18-thousand others who joined the group on Saturday.

I mean, come on. To him, this is the face of America.

And sadly, I don’t think its improved very much under Shrub.

You might notice there seems to be a big gap in the archives - they skip from November 2004 to March of 2006. Those posts are still up at countertop-chronicles.blogspot.com, but I’m in the process of importing them all over to Word Press. This might take some time, so please bear with me, and blogging will resume to normal shortly.

If it’s smelly, we roll in it. If it can be upchucked at 3 a.m., we eat it. Porcupines should be chomped, snakes should be tossed, and by all means, if there’s a hornet’s nest in a rock wall, we darn well need to excavate and there’s no human bed too small to be shared.

Rex is cute and sweet as can be. He’s going great - he goes off for a couple of weeks of mixed waterfowl and upland training this coming weekend - but I still miss Beaux.

Keep these two quotes (both, incidentally, from Oregon), and their circumstances, in mind as you finish preparing comments to the Department of Interior on their proposal to restore the right of self defense in our national parks.

Now my eyes were locked on a crouching cougar on the opposite hill as I reloaded my 20 gauge with the biggest shot size I had with me–copper-coated number sixes. These weren’t quite the slugs I was to have carried. Right then I felt under-gunned and pretty dumb for not following through on my intuition.

Here’s a picture of that cougar. . .and you can read all about the writers encounter with him and his companion over at Gun Dogs Magazine

“And I’m really glad I had that gun.”

That’s Joshua McKim and the 400 pound cinnamon colored black bear that attacked him as he was mushroom picking with his family.

When the bear just up the hill roared, Joshua McKim’s first thought was that he had never heard a bear make a sound like that.

His second thought, almost instantaneous with the first, was that he was awfully glad he had brought his pistol on this mushroom-picking trip.

When he first glimpsed the bear through the thick brush, McKim had cocked the hammer on the .45 caliber semi-automatic Taurus, a copy of the famous 1911-model Colt.

The bear didn’t move.

Luckily, he was the one the bear attacked, as he was the only member of his group that carried a gun afield that day.